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These tips are divided into sections that correspond to the Sourcebook. Please have your Sourcebook in front of you when reviewing these helpful hints and suggestions.
Opening Month
Gather:
Group leaders may want to do additional “ice breakers” depending on needs of the group.
Reflect:
If can’t go outside to see the moon try something else; close your eyes and picture it, look at a picture of the moon, etc.
Do:
Pick someone to make a poster of the completed rules or write them on the ritual cloth later.
Explore:
This month’s activity can feel “school-ish” yet it is important to make it fun! The group leader keeps the activity flowing by asking questions and summarizing comments. Can “jazz it up” by telling girls to “pose” i.e., stand on one foot, back to back, etc. while reading their cards together. The goal of this activity is for them to begin to understand Rosh Hodesh!
Create:
Remember to protect your space with a drop cloth, etc. Be proactive – spend time talking about the purpose of the cloth to prevent issues like inappropriate drawings, etc. Encourage girls to dive in, have fun, be creative, and remember it doesn’t have to be perfect! It should be representative of the whole group somehow.
Bring It Home:
Group leaders should decide in advance how they want to use the Essence Sheet each month. Some suggestions include:
- Photocopy them and give them as a handout
- Create three ring binders and each month add the Essence Sheet for the month – the group leader collects the binders and distributes them at the end of the year
- Laminate them so they can be used multiple years and so they seem more special
- Distribute them to parents/girls at the end of the meeting
Closing:
Group leader may choose to turn off or dim the lights!
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Tishrey
Gather:
You can use pomegranate juice if you can’t get a pomegranate
Explore:
Begin by asking the girls if they know what lashon hara is.
Do:
This skit is lots of fun! It can be adapted for more girls to participate by doing it in two different groups while the group leader circulates. Another alternative is to have the girls do it twice – first one pair does it, then the group leader asks questions and before the girls answer a new pair does the skit again (girls love to do the skit and this way more get a chance to “act”).
Explore:
Emphasize the importance of re-doing the skit in a way that avoids lashon hara. Some group leaders have commented that this portion is a stretch for younger girls to grasp.
Reflect:
Group leader can send the girls their letters at the secular New Year, winter break, etc.
Closing:
Page two of the Essence Sheet gives an additional explanation for Rosh Hashanah greetings.
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Heshvan
At a Glance:
This is about the complex nature of friendships. The goal is to have the girls think critically.
Gather:
You could broaden the Opening Question to “who of all the people you know understands you the best?”
Explore:
Ask them what they know about the month and the women we are exploring.
Use the Facilitator’s Resource (p. 11) as a handout and read it round robin to share the story. Girls get more out of it.
Bring It Home:
After Simchat Torah we start with the Torah portion, Genesis – it’s a great opportunity to really think about the Torah portion.
Closing:
As an additional activity have the girls write a note to a friend (who is not in the Rosh Hodesh group) about their friendship or write a note to someone else in the group.
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Kislev
Gather:
For the Opening Question you may have to first define “role model” or ask the girls, “what is a role model?”
Explore:
For telling the story – to keep the girls attention and involvement assign girls sections to read and sections to “pantomime” while the speaker is talking.
Keep the story succinct and high energy to keep the girls attention
Create:
An alternative to making social networking pages is to run the group like a talk show. One group leader called the talk show hostesses "Orli." Each girl was assigned a famous Jewish woman. Two girls were given the role of "Orli" and they worked together to develop the questions that they wanted to ask the women. Each girl who was assigned a famous woman took time to read her biography and then write down the important information that they wanted to share. They put on the talk show for an audience with rotating “guests.”
If you are looking for a craft activity this month, we suggest that the girls make a picture frame for a woman they admire. They can use the "wise words" to put in the frames. Lucite frames and paint pens work well.
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Tevet
Gather:
Note facilitator tip – have a girl read the Opening Question – write it on a 3 x 5 card in advance.
A group leader effectively used a Barbie doll to help introduce the topic.
Explore:
Pick the parts of this (massage, stretching, dance) that your participants will respond to. Don’t leave out the hevrutah cards.
Create:
Group leader may want to put the blessing on a poster so the girls don’t have to hold it.
Acknowledge risk taking: encourage girls to do it even if they feel uncomfortable at first – taking a personal risk (and telling the girls you are doing it) will be good role modeling for them to try new things, e.g. yoga or creating blessing movements. One group leader reported: “This gathering was about saying things that are honest, so telling them that I was taking a risk was personally very humbling.”
Group leader should model the first movement and also model doing it expansively in a fun, dancing way – take a risk and they will too!
An undecided or reticent girl may choose to re-engage if she is given an option to defer and wait instead of opting out entirely: Group leader could say, “If you don’t know if you want to offer a movement right now, why don’t you hold off until the end to decide.”
Do:
The yoga movement activity is scripted as a Facilitator’s Resource, and it is also on the It’s a Girl Sing CD!
If you don’t have an instructor, prepare by going through the script on the CD at home so you know what to expect it to feel like. You can lead the yoga by reading the script, playing the CD, or doing your own thing! May also use a segment of a video – but this is not as personal or effective.
Have the girls demonstrate yoga poses they know.
Tell them in advance to dress for doing yoga and bring a mat or a towel.
Play meditative music during yoga.
Expect giggling but encourage girls who are not interested in fully participating in all the poses to respect the silence in the room and everyone who is trying to relax and focus.
Girls love this! Allow plenty of time for them to really do some yoga and transition when it is over.
Reflect:
Use a shredder instead of a garbage can to add a “modern” element.
If you run out of time just distribute the Feel Fabulous cards and have them read them for closing.
Make extra cards so that girls can bring home a different card than the one they received if they want to.
Decorate the cards (as prep for the meeting) with some stickers or markers. Laminate if possible.
Encourage your girls to try carrying a Feel Fabulous card around with them in their pocket, wallet, hang it on their mirror, bulletin board, locker, etc.
Group leader can distribute a whole set of cards to each girl in a sachet or little box, etc. and encourage them to pick and read one a day or as needed.
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Shevat
CD Suggestions:
“Eretz Zavat Chalav” – play on repeat as girls are arriving and then point out what they were listening to when you gather.
“A Way to Say Ah” – girls can appreciate and understand these lyrics – great conversation starter for this month.
At a Glance:
Shevat is a “smorgasbord” – there are a lot of separate pieces to mix and match. You don’t have to do them in order!
There is more to do in this month than there is time in a gathering, so do whatever will be most interesting to your girls.
Gather:
In Tevet the girls were invited to practice Feel Fabulous strategies. Ask the girls where they put their Feel Fabulous cards and how the messages from your last meeting applied to their daily lives.
Girls were also invited to recite the morning blessing with an appreciative kavanah (intention). Ask the girls if any of them practiced them. Also ask if anyone heard the Birhot Hashahar (Morning Blessing) at services and thought of their own dance steps.
Opening Question – the girls may need more of an explanation of what is meant by “nature” i.e., it can be anywhere outside – not just parks! Some girls have shared thoughts about the beach, camp, their backyard, trips, the woods, etc.
Explore:
Can do a mini-Seder using the fruit and juice analogies – the girls love it!
You will need to think through and prepare for the juice pouring to make it go smoothly (depends on how many girls you have). For a large group, give each girl three cups – one empty, one with white juice and one with dark. The girls can then pour from the full glasses into the empty one for each glass. For a small group, give each girl a glass/cup and have pitchers of both kinds of juice to serve from. In a small group it’s nice to use real glassware if you can. Be sure to do this over a plastic mat or at a table with a table cloth – grape juice stains!
Refer to page 3 of the Essence Sheet to prepare for the food part of the seder – you don’t have to use everything – one from each category is fine. If you have a host girl, she can choose from the list and help do the shopping with either the group leader or her parent (depending on who buys the food).
Encourage the girls to try foods they’ve never tasted.
Suggest the girls close their eyes when eating to better experience the flavor.
Each girl could bring a fruit or nut to the gathering to share for the seder.
There are resources listed for more extensive seders on the sidebar of page two of the Essence Sheet.
Can have your discussion around the mini-seder, or perhaps end the gathering with the seder. Either way, allow time for it – the girls really enjoy it and you’ll want to make it like a mini-seder, not just food set out on plates and everyone eating it.
Do:
A group leader suggested not calling it “charades” – sounds hokey. Call it movement or interpretation.
You can really explain these four elements as relating to their lives. Air/Intellectual World is your academic/school life, Earth/Physical World is sports, your body, how you move, Water/Emotional World is how you feel – your happiness, anger, jealousy, etc. and Fire/Spiritual World is what you feel is spiritual – traditions, religion, rituals, special times. These are just examples – it’s very personal how the girls interpret these – ask for their examples and interpretations of the four elements before you begin to introduce the movement activity.
Within their small groups they can act out different aspects of the card – i.e., one person do something for water, another for the emotional world, or they can make up one motion together.
String all the movements together as one big group after each group has presented. Put on music and do it as a dance (like in Tevet).
Reflect:
Take time to have them find their own, quiet space in the room. Direct them to sit far away from other girls that they would be tempted to talk to since this is a very quiet activity.
The group is more formed at this point in the year, so there is more trust among the girls, which works well for this kind of activity.
Remember to pause between questions to give girls enough time for the visualizations.
Give girls permission to lower their eyes and not close them if that feels safer.
Give them space to laugh or giggle if they need to before starting the meditation.
You are introducing them to the idea of meditation – they may have preconceived notions about what it is or be intimidated. Invite them to try it out – it’s really just being very present with your thoughts and a “guided” meditation allows a guide to direct one’s thinking, allowing for a deeper, more expansive experience.
Create:
Making the Rainstick:
- We strongly recommend that group leaders do this at home first to practice so you can see how it’s done and how long it takes!
- Girls love this craft!
- This craft takes a lot of time – allow at LEAST half an hour.
- You will need a paper towel tube for each girl. Call/e-mail to remind them to bring them and bring plenty of extras. Wrapping paper tubes work well too.
- Decorate with magazines, construction paper, markers and stickers. If you use magazines it will take longer because the girls get really distracted by finding the right pictures, words.
- Put the straight pins in along the “seams” of the towel tube – they go in easier.
- Coat the finished project with “modge podge” to seal it and make it glossy.
- Wrap rainsticks in scrapbooking paper with nature motifs – beautiful and takes much less time!
- Put pins in the stick as well as beans – it makes a great sound.
- Cover your work space carefully – especially in homes. You don’t want to leave little pins behind on the floor.
- Get Israel brochures to decorate sticks – they usually have great pictures from nature and tie in to Israel.
- Make sure you allow time for them to use the rainsticks in a closing ritual – it’s very cool.
- The girls love taking the rain sticks home, but if they want to they can keep them with the Rosh Hodesh Cloth and use them as instruments for the opening blessing at future gatherings.
Alternative: make talking sticks.
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Adar I
At a Glance:
Girls report that this is one of their favorite gatherings. It works well as a mother-daughter gathering.
Gather:
In Shevat the girls were invited to experiment with nature visualizations when they felt stressed. Inquire about it.
Opening Question – the group leader asks for a volunteer to read and model the opening question, therefore in preparing for the gathering the group leader should write the question on a 3 x 5 card to give to her
Don’t forget foods for the month – see Essence Sheet p.4. There are great foods this month.
Create:
The magazines can be very distracting for the girls, so try to do things that will limit the distraction (give clear instructions, emphasize the time limit, supply only one magazine per pair).
Tell the girls to bring magazines that they are ready to recycle! If you just tell them to bring their favorite magazine they may not want to cut it up. A good direction is: bring a magazine that you like to read that you are ready to recycle.
You may want to prepare by re-reading the Tevet gathering plan; help the girls see the connection (or continuum) between the topics of the two gatherings.
Tie the completed scrolls with a decorative ribbon and save them to possibly display at a Rosh Hodesh: It’s a Girl Thing! showcase at your host institution.
Keep in mind that we are learning how to think critically and look at things differently. Group leaders should be cautious not to “put down” the images in magazines in a way that girls would take personally because this is the girls’ culture. They may not be as offended as you are because they live in a different world and they are in a different stage of development. The magazines themselves are not good or bad, we are looking at them with a critical eye. We are not telling the girls not to read magazines, we are teaching them how to analyze what they are reading. Keep in mind we are not telling girls what to think, but to think!
Do:
Please check out http://www.about-face.org/ – a website about the media. This great site has sample letters you can use as a basis for “girlcotting” letters to companies
Write a group letter from the whole group if you are short on time.
Bring It Home:
Encourage girls to do this and be sure to follow up next month. Send the girls a reminder e-mail about it or send parents an e-mail summarizing the Gathering and the “Bring it Home” assignment. Let the girls know that they can “have a voice” about these issues.
Before You Leave:
IF APPLICABLE: Groups in the past have had very successful collections that don’t require a lot of work – one group went through their closets and brought clothing donations – they filled their group leader’s mini-van with bags of their discarded clothes!
Closing:
Powerful and wonderful closing – try to save time for it.
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Adar II
At a Glance:
This is an amazing gathering that requires careful preparation!
Explore:
OTHER THINGS TO INCORPORATE IN YOUR DISCUSSIONS:
- Notice that we all move between different settings and may have different aspects of ourselves that emerge in each setting (e.g. at school, during synagogue services, at the JCC, at home with family, around each parent – especially if divorced or if parents are interfaith, out with friends, music classes, sports activities, etc.).
- Ask: are there things that we conceal or reveal about ourselves per different settings? Are there visible symbols by which we are identifiable as Jews?
- Recall the Jews of Eastern Europe who were forced to wear a yellow star during WWII.
- Hiding your Jewishness: we can sometimes hide our visible Judaism in a way that others can’t (e.g. an Arab woman who wears a burka or a veil or a Sikh man in a turban). However, there are also many ways that Jews may be identifiable by what they wear (e.g. kipah, tzitzit, Star of David pendant, sheitl-wig, long skirt).
- Ask: Is being visibly Jewish different for boys and girls?
Create:
This activity is so powerful. Many group leaders and girls report that it’s their favorite gathering. It’s really a unique process.
This craft is especially intimate for the girls. It requires them to really trust each other to touch each other’s faces, protect their eyes, listen, and communicate their needs. It is a very “bonding” activity! Let the girls know this. It’s sort of like getting a facial – but even cooler because they get a mask. Group leaders should have the awareness that the process is as important as the product here.
Mask-making tips:
- This is a messy activity! Bring tarps (shower curtains, table cloths, etc.) and cleaning supplies (soap and towels, baby wipes). Bring headbands or bandanas for the girls to hold their hair back – they like to keep them of course.
- Girls may be wary of putting things on their faces – encourage them to trust the process and try it, but don’t force it! They can do their hand (still with a partner) if they are really opposed to doing their face. Be aware that many adolescent girls struggle with acne
- The experience of having the mask applied may be very intense or intimidating for some girls because they are looked/stared at so intently during the process.
- Be sure to do at least 2, probably 3 layers of plaster so the mask “holds.”
- After applying the strips, wet finger with water and smooth out the edges. Use water sparingly, too much and it falls apart – but enough to smooth out the rough edges.
- Be sure to let the mask harden before removing it. Girls can “wear” their mask as it dries and do their partner this way. Have a mirror handy!
- This activity takes a VERY long time so you may want to start the gathering with the mask making right away and then do the discussion while the masks dry. Decorate the masks at the end. Also, if the group leader and/or the host pre-cuts the strips of plaster into small pieces it saves a lot of time.
- Group leaders can suggest that the conclusion of the mask-making be fun “facial time” using other kinds of special skin care products to clean up with. (Invite the girls to bring their favorites.)
- Buy supplies at an art store or on-line art store. Direct links to order the plaster are: http://www.dickblick.com/zz335/05/ or http://store.artcity.com/act-231.html
Alternatives to plaster masks:
- Use Styrofoam wig-heads as the face forms instead of actual faces, though they won’t match the shape of the girls’ faces as well when completed
- Use construction paper to make masks, although they may be somewhat flimsy
- Use theatrical paint instead of making masks, but it is totally impermanent and doesn’t give the girls experience of working in pairs on the project since they would have to decorate their own faces in front of mirrors in order to use this activity to express themselves personally.
- If you really need to save time and/or money, full face masks can be be purchased from art supply houses such as http://www.enasco.com/artsandcrafts/ or http://www.orientaltrading.com/ .
Group leaders are strongly encouraged to try this activity. It may seem intimidating, but it is well worth the leap of faith – please call the national office if you’d like more coaching or encouragement!
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Nisan
CD Suggestions:
“By the Shores” – lyrics directly support the theme of the month. Group leaders can first pass the lyrics out and have a girl read them aloud. Then play the song and hand out tambourines – encourage the girls to dance like Miriam.
Gather:
Opening question: focus is on how the girls feel when they decide to take a risk – not on what the risk is. For example, a girl says, “I take a risk when I call someone new, ride a roller coaster, etc.” Encourage her to share how that feels – i.e., Nerve-wracking, scary, etc. Ask them to wait until later to share more about what risks they’ve taken.
Group leaders may want to have a handout/poster of examples of “feeling/emotion” words for girls to choose from for their responses. Many teens (and adults!) have trouble finding words to express their feelings. They resort to mad/sad/glad. This is an opportunity to enhance their “feelings vocabulary.”
Some great “emotions posters” (that you may have other opportunities to use/hang up) can be found in the Free Spirit Publishing catalog at: http://www.freespirit.com/catalog/item_detail.cfm?ITEM_ID=182
or
http://www.freespirit.com/catalog/item_detail.cfm?ITEM_ID=29andCAT_ID=19
Freespirit is a great catalog for group leaders!
Don’t forget the foods for the month – see Essence Sheet p.4/6. Great foods this month! If your gathering is during Passover offer some creative kosher for Passover munchies.
Do:
It’s fun to really set the stage for the “performance.” Let the audience get comfortable and create an appropriate stage.
Use props and costumes for the performance! Ask the host girl to bring her old “dress up” stuff – this really helps the girls lose their inhibitions and gives them a chance to do something they still love to do but probably don’t get to do anymore – play dress up. The costumes could be head turbans, long skirts and tambourines, but a modern re-telling with feather boas and sunglasses works well too!
If the group is small (4 or 5 girls) let them come up with something for all the cards – do a whole play! Or divide them into pairs and give each pair two cards.
Group leaders should pre-read cards for the More About Miriam so they are knowledgeable about the material, (in Act 2 concept of a “wet nurse”).
Create:
Craft stores sell washable paint that is specifically for painting glass. Come prepared with enough little paintbrushes for all the girls. The paints are reasonably priced and the colors come up beautiful.
Tacky glued jewels (from craft stores) work well.
Real wine goblets can be found for a relatively inexpensive price (Kmart, Target, etc.)
As with all crafts, really protect your space and leave ample time for clean up.
Bring It Home:
Girls can paste the handout onto a pretty piece of paper, laminate it, make copies and distribute at their seder
Group leaders talk with girls about what it would be like for them to bring this to their seders.
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Iyar
Explore:
Girls (particularly in middle school) have a lot to say about this topic.
Lashon hara (gossip) is a potential issue for this conversation so be sure to be very clear going into it by either reviewing the group guidelines, making a rule of “no names or descriptive information,” or speaking only of the girls’ own experiences and using “I” statements.
If the article is too long you can highlight sections to explore.
Create:
If you don’t hand out the Essence Sheet, be sure to make copies of page 2 for the Omer information. (Could present it cut out and pasted on colored paper so it’s something they can save).
String from a craft store works well for this – there are beautiful colors and the girls often know how to make bracelets out of the string by tying it in patterns. Highlight a girl by asking her to teach the group how to make the bracelets.
If none of the girls can help with teaching how to make a bracelet and the group leader doesn’t know how either, buy a bracelet making kit
Instructions for making bracelets with colored string can be found at: http://www.ehow.com/how_4460535_make-thread-bracelets.html
Michael’s sells embroidery string. Check out: http://www.michaels.com/art/online/displayProductPage?productNum=nw0292
Hemp or bead bracelets also work well.
Adding a charm to the bracelet (like one little moon or heart) is fun.
Allow plenty of time for this – it’s fun and your initial conversation can continue while you are making the bracelets or you can use the time to talk about plans for next year and your closing gathering. The girls may need to finish the bracelets at home.
Other Suggestions:
Sivan has some great quotes on friendship that can be used this month for part of the conversation if you are not doing the Sivan material next month (if you are doing Closing Month instead).
Omer time between Pesach and Shavuot = self-improvement time, like between Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur: the bracelet helps you focus this process.
The Omer time is about “counting your days and making your days count.”
Ask girls to bring a piece of jewelry that is important to them to the gathering and share what their connection is to the jewelry. Then make the bridge to the activity that day.
Honor Yom Ha’atzma’ut by discussing women’s roles in the Israeli army.
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Closing Month
This month is about reflecting and appreciating the past year as well as looking forward. Even though your group may be continuing – the closure for the year is important. Take this month to enjoy the girls, celebrate all that you have created together – and make plans for an exciting second year!
CLOSING MONTH STANDS ON ITS OWN. There is not enough time to do Closing Month and Sivan and give Closing Month the time it deserves. If you feel you must include something from Sivan please highlight something from the Essence Sheet: Fast Facts, Fabulous Females or Foods of the Month.
There is a lot of material for this month. If you want to have a lot of time for the craft and/or party you many need to pick and choose what you do.
Many groups include the parents for closing month (for all or part of the meeting) and do a sundae bar, frappucinos, tea, etc. Girls can share favorite things they did this year, parents can meet, and plans can be made for the Fall. You could also invite the parents to meet separately from the girls for a part of the meeting.
Explore:
A shorter way of doing this could be using the index cards for the following:
- List your favorite aspects of Rosh Hodesh this year.
- List things you’d like to talk about next year (could photocopy the Sourcebook Index for the girls to look at for ideas for this).
- List how participants can take on more leadership next year as well as other suggestions for the group.
One of the purposes of this activity is to help build expectation and excitement for next year. The girls need to feel they have a say in what will happen next year. It’s also helpful for them to know that the things that they love won’t change but that there will be changes to make the group a growing continuation of fun, learning and friendship (and not just a repeat of the year before).
You may also want to take this time to talk with the girls about adding more members if you need to add more girls (and how you will recruit them), group leader changes, and anything else important or relevant for the Fall.
Adjust the activity as noted if your group is not continuing. You may want to schedule a single “reunion group” meeting if you are not able to continue next year.
Reflect:
If you created a packet of Essence Sheets to distribute, or have had the girls adding them to a folder all year – hand them out at this time.
Note Facilitator Tip – you may have them decorate this packet as the final craft.
Do:
This is a special and rewarding activity for the girls to express their friendship for each other.
Be sensitive about girls writing longer and shorter affirmations to each other depending on their level of friendship. Some friendships may spark writing a “yearbook passage” full of private jokes and compliments, others may only write the word, “nice.” To avoid hurt feelings ask the girls to only write one or two descriptive words about each other as the name sheets go around.
Make affirmations into a bookmark, hanging mobile, etc.
Put the affirmations onto a plastic colored clipboard (use paint pens for the activity) that they could then take for the summer.
Create:
Rocks can be found at garden centers, Michaels, etc.
Group leaders have done various other ending crafts including painting wooden moons, making T-shirts, picture frames, etc. The sky is the limit – please share your ideas with the national office so we can share them with everyone.
Do:
Allow time for girls to just hang out – sundae bar, make smoothies, take crazy pictures.
Closing:
Don’t skip this. It’s a great closure and you can make a copy of the completed poem and mail it to all the girls over the summer along with a group picture and roster of camp addresses so they can correspond over the summer.
Collect summer addresses!
Still To Do:
Note the list in Sourcebook –it’s different than other months and these are important follow up pieces.
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